I realized recently that, for all my talk, I’m really good at hinging the things that I want to do on other people.
I earmark plans and file them away. “Things To Do with This Specific Person.” Then I slide them away to collect dust in the corners.
Because I’ve given the responsibility to someone else. It’s not on *me* anymore. It’s on scheduling, it’s on the timing working out right. It’s on the stars aligning so I can do this thing with this person.
Instead of me, choosing to do the things that I want to do.
It’s weird, because there is some line somewhere, between choosing to do it all by yourself, and going for the stoic, depending-on-no-one, thing and then being a complete pack-animal and choosing to follow the people you surround yourself with.
There’s got to be something in the middle. Or, middle-ish. Or, middle-enough-to-work-for-me.
I think that maybe this is also one of those life-things? That maybe take forever.
Because it’s always changing, the people you have, and the things you want to do.
Maybe it’s not so much choosing not to earmark plans for people, but choosing better people to earmark plans for.