Today I thought “Wow, it sure is gorgeous here! I’m really going to miss the beach!” so I decided to go for a walk.
I’m a dipshit though, so I also thought “Wow! I really hate wearing shoes, so I’m going to walk to the beach barefoot! Then I won’t have to carry my shoes when I get in the water! It’ll be great!”
Completely forgetting about all of the BURNING HOT FUCKING ASPHALT that literally PAVES THE WAY to the beach.
So, I BURNED THE SHIT out of the bottoms of my feet.
(Okay. So, it was less that I forgot, and more that I sort of never wore shoes in Australia? So, like, I could go for a walk in the outback without shoes on, so I figured I’d be fine. I forgot that there have been a few months between me *now* and me *then* during which period of time I managed to pretty much lose ALL OF MY CALLOUSES.)
My feet feel like fire.
It hurts to walk.
Holy shit what have I done.
The plane ride tomorrow is going to be *awesome*.